Hannah Montana life

As I wake up every morning and rip off a sticky note on my countdown for my family to arrive, I notice the days are very limited. Also that so many emotions run through my mind all at the same moment. Not sure how to explain what I am feeling right now. 7 days until I am able to see my family. At times I am happy I will see them, then I think that my family arriving is actually a reality of my time running out here, which makes me sad. Then there are times where I am anxious, but turns into nerves because I will be one step closer to see the changes I have made in myself when I get back home. I get teary-eyed when I picture the moment standing in the gate waiting to see them walk through the doors into this other world. I won't know what to do, it is so surreal. Do I cry? But why would I cry? Do I smile? Do I scream? Do I laugh? Not sure of that moment get to give my mom, my dad, and my brothers a big hug or actually being able to give them a kiss on the cheek, and hold them in my arms and not let go or being able to talk with ease and not feel like I am awkwardly a 4th wheel of the family or especially not having the computer screen restraining me to do that. It doesn't seem real. The thing is, I actually forget about a lot of the things I had in my life back at home. I am not sure where to even call home now. I find many questions run through my head about how my family was compared to how they are now. Being able to actually see them rather than just a floating head over skype. When I think to myself there are so many doubt I have. I try to remember how tall my mom was, or if my dads hair was turning white yet, or if cammy had outgrown me, or the faces owen makes. I had many disagreements with my family, but thinking back I could only remember the good times that I had spent with them. I couldn't even picture one fight that I had with a family member. Very strange. My life now here in Brazil is normal. Everything that was out of the ordinary when I first arrived, is now normal. Like seeing someone riding a horse on the street with the cars, or seeing stones on the streets instead of pavement, or seeing a one lane highway that has a hairpin turn every 300m, or seeing so many stray dogs in the streets you can't even count them. I forget a lot of how the USA actually is, or in that case "was". My life now is spilt into two. Every exchange student has the chance to make a "new life" when you go on exchange, going somewhere where no one knows you, and being forced to make a living. My family is the only thing that will see both of my lives I have made. It is kind of like the Disney show Hannah Montana. I have a life that I have made here and a life I had when I was back in the states. Two separate lives and my family will be able to see both side of the story. It is weird to think that they will be the only people who will be linking these lives together. As I look back on the time here, I feel like it hasn't been over 3 months saying my last goodbyes to my family and friends. Giving my mom and dad a last hug before I got on the plane to leave for 10 months seems like it was a short time ago. 10 months is actually no time at all, but these 7 days waiting for my family seem like an eternity. I actually don't even picture my family here in Brazil with me. It actually is unbelievable. Don't get me wrong, I and pumped to show them all that I have accomplished, but there is something that just can't wrap my mind around them ACTUALLY coming. Everyone here is so excited to meet my family, there is almost billboards around the town telling every citizen. I was talking with my first host mom the other day and she was saying that she has so much she wants to say to my mom but she won't be able to say it because of the language barrier. This goes back to my first months here. The people will now get a little taste of the difficulty I had on arriving here. The difficulty of having so much to say and express but not being able to say or express anything. And I will tell you its super difficult, but so worth it!